Seasons Greetings
Last week was a hard week so I apologize to anyone who was awaiting a blog post. It’s not that I didn't have anything to write about because I did, but I didn't want to post anything I didn't truly believe in at the time. I’m learning that this is all apart of my journey especially with bettering my mental health. I am going to have some pretty great weeks but I will also have some pretty bad ones. Last week just happened to be a bad one. I was speaking with a friend and they told me that when they aren't feeling their greatest they choose to stay away from talking and texting people because they wont get the best version of them. I took a step back after hearing that and realized that I’ve never done this. Normally, no matter how I’m feeling I’m always talking to or hanging out with people because I’ve always felt like people make me feel better. I’ve always felt that when I’m with them I want to be my best self. I am now realizing that it all was just a distraction from dealing with myself. I would want to be my best self but I would never actually be. I am not saying that you shouldn’t be with others when you’re feeling down, in fact I myself encourage that if you have someone you can be with, you should. It’s hard to deal with issues alone, but they’re your issues and unfortunately only you can deal with them. I wouldn’t deal with my issues at all but I’d try to cover them up with time with others. What I didn’t realize is that when it’s all said and done or the move/event is over, I have to go home and deal with my problems. The best thing for me to do is to deal with them when they come about. Having that “head start” on dealing with my issues makes it easier to get over and find a solution instead of allowing them to linger on in my mind. No matter how deep you try push down your problems they always come back, so take them head on. I promise you are stronger than you give yourself credit for. But enough of the sadness because this week is much better, and at the end of the day we get to choose whether or not we are happy. I choose happiness, or rather I choose to be content in my life. So lets talk about something that brings me happiness and hopefully you all too!
November and December have to be the second and third best months after the best month, September. Now, if you’re born in Nov and Dec please sit down, it’s NOT about you. Those two months are the next best months, in my opinion, because they are the most family oriented months. November 1st comes and it’s now Christmas time. Everyone puts up all their decorations and begins listening to Christmas music as if Thanksgiving doesn’t come first. Those who love Christmas go hard, and when Thanksgiving comes they take a day break only to resume again on Black Friday because that is prime time Christmas shopping. Although I come from a family who doesn’t celebrate Christmas, I myself love Christmas. To me, Christmas spirit just means happiness. Now I might have romanticized Christmas time a little but how could I not? My Christmas tradition was to wake up early morning and make myself hot chocolate. Yes, I was in Miami but it’d be a little chilly that morning so please just continue reading. After my microwaved hot chocolate, I’d sit on the couch and just watch Christmas movies all day, fantasizing my life as if I was apart of those families. I know this may sound sad but don’t get it twisted, I loved it! As a kid I lived in my head for the most part so I was just fine doing this tradition. My parents worked on Christmas so at night when my mom came home she’d bring whatever her job made that year, and my dad would bring home the best eggnog ever. That to me was a Christmas well spent. I then got introduced to an actual Christmas by my Aunt and cousins. I slept over one year and they taught me their rule of getting to open one present on Christmas Eve and enjoying a Christmas breakfast in the morning after you’ve ran downstairs to open the rest of your presents. It was then that I knew that I’d want to have a mix of this with my own family one day. As I’ve grown older I’ve had many different variations of Christmas Day. I’ve even spent Christmas at the beach partying and playing football with friends. For me as long as I am surrounded by people I love and enjoy, it’s a Christmas well spent.
This year’s Christmas is going to be a little different. It isn’t at all where I’d picture myself if you would have asked me last year, but I'm learning to be thankful no matter what, a realization that came from Thanksgiving. I feel like this year was the first year that I understood to be thankful. I haven’t been home for Thanksgiving since my sophomore year of college but every year, I was still able to find not one but a couple of houses to stop by. This year that wasn’t the case. I got invited to a Friendsgiving the night before Thanksgiving and I was genuinely excited to go. I get in my car after work and start driving only to catch a flat on my way. It’s freezing cold and I’m trying to change my tire but the lug nuts won’t budge and before you ask, I have changed a tire before. Maybe I was just cold and tired but it wasn’t working out. I was able to get it home and wait for shops to open in the morning. It is now Thanksgiving day and I planned to go to see my bro in Delaware which was only a two hour drive, but now that I’ve caught this flat it was looking slow. I was able to get a new tire put on but my car wasn’t ready till the afternoon so now Delaware just wasn’t an option. In a last minute decision I decide that I’m just going to cook and chill with Arlo (my dog). I get everything I need and get ready to cook and in walks my roommate. I was super happy, I thought he was going to be with his family but he chose to come back to the crib. Long story short, we end up cooking together and making a feast. I learned to be thankful with what you have cause it could always be worse. Like I could not have had the funds to even get my tire changed or buy the groceries needed to cook dinner. Maybe I could have went to Delaware or even the Friendsgiving the night prior but who knows, something drastic could have happened on the road. There are just so many unknown factors, and I was just happy that I was home safe with a great meal to eat. I’ve been riding that wave ever since because although this isn’t what I envisioned for this season, it’s still a great time. I am dead smiling writing this because it was so unexpected but when I think of the blessings I have and the possibilities of the future, I can’t help but smile. It may not be the season you intended to have but you’re alive and breathing. Rule #32 from the great movie Zombieland states to enjoy the little things. Even in a zombie apocalypse you can choose to enjoy the little things. As we go through this perpendicular with new variants like omarion, we can choose to be thankful for what we have, choose to love those around us, and choose to not just exist but to live our lives. As always, I love you and I am happy that you’re here, alive and well. Go out and live and enjoy this Christmas season with those whom you love. Merry Christmas or Happy Hanukkah! If you don’t celebrate either, have an AMAZING day!!!